Hi everyone, I’m Stephen. I’ve been struggling with anxiety and panic disorder for the past 18 months. I’ve become a born again Christian in that time and through this I’ve learnt a lot and I am continuing to learn everyday. Everyday is different and each day has brought new challenges. Recently I’ve been told I have had this since I was younger but its only manifested itself fully now. So here is my journey hoping someone else can relate or find comfort that we all face trials and challenges. I have been struggling with my new found faith and my new disorder. I’ve experienced spiritual attacks, intrusive thoughts, I’ve been as low as you can go in your own mind in such a short space of time. I feel like blogging will help me express my feelings and emotions and aid my healing process. I want to share how God has given me strength when I felt like giving up and that I couldn’t go on. God has been there with me through the highs and lows and I hope I can relate to others facing trials and tough times.
Being raised in a Christian home I knew about God. And Jesus from a young age but growing up as a teen in the naughties (2000 onwards) was tough and I turned my back on church and God as soon as I was old enough to not go. Don’t get be wrong I always believed in God but never really genuinely accepted Jesus Christ as our Lord and Saviour. I drank, took drugs. I didn’t know the Bible well enough and I just thought I was doing what any young man does but now I’ve come to realise the error of my ways that I was selfish and living my life for the me, the Devil had a grip on me and was squeezing tighter, pulling me down into a world and a skin I wasn’t truly happy in.
Now I have found the Lord and accepted him life has been tough, its not easy defeating your old sinful nature but everyday I can see the hope and grace God is giving me and the strength to defeat the vice I was once being held in.
I know I’m not the only one going through this and I can’t say I’m going to teach you anything but I thought sharing my thoughts and experiences I might reach someone or someone might reach out to me.
Anyway, I hope you enjoy and continue to read this blog……